crumbles the acid dropping desk dwelling stale old cookie and the search for the cinnamon shoe girl

Crumbles was stale, 'I need a change of scene man.' he said to me as we shared a joint on the shoe girl's desk. I dont remember how i made it to the desk, my last memory being a little white pill fed-exed to me by jefferson aeroplane, a white rabbit pointing and laughing at me. i swallowed the pill and the rabbit with the last swallow of vodka in my bottle. i shrank like a sheep in a washing machine. i followed crumbles to the carpark, located by a barbie doll's house. she stood in her doorway with glazed eyes. i whispered in her ear and she slipped some acid into my eye. the world wobbled and crumbles and i drove to far drove to fast. "We're we going?" i asked. Crumbles started singing Neil Young songs, i decided to sing Lynard Skynard songs. My blackberry buzzed and the shoe girl was lost among bikini wearing papyrus print. Crumble Young was singing cinnamon girl. We drove through a wall, stopped at deed poll. "I'd like to change my name' i told the lady. she rolled her eyes and snapped her gum, crumbles giggled at her oversized bum. "what to?" she asked, noticing crumble's roving eyes.
"Apple" i replies. she waved her magic wand and it was so. Crumble and i walked back to the car,
"Apple Crumble on the road again" we chanted to the tune of cinnamon girl. "I see televisions" said the shoe girl. "Are you a cinnamon girl?" asked crumble. She shook her head despite the fact we were using telephones. "It reminds me of ads" said the cinnamon shoe girl.
"Like minuses?" i asked in my bakers apple tone of voice.
"Like minus is negative"she said, or something similar.
"I've never been good with mathematics. But three acid tabs and two acid tabs equals crazy apple crumble with cinnamon on top...right?" we all agreed. Crumbles, sick of being a biscuit decided upon a suitable disguise for our entry into bikini wearing papyrus print land. he dressed himself as a bfg, a big fucking german. i bought a bikini from the opera house in darwin. we were set. we asked the cinnamon girl for directions. "what'd she say?" asked the crumbling bfg. "We go straight till we get to a fork in the road"
"I have a fork in my pocket" said crumble as he pulled it out. i snatched it off him and stabbed him numerous times. he died on impact, completely forked. but thats how the cookie crumbles.
i dropped a whole sheet of acid in my left eye, my right one was broken, a tattoo gone terribly wrong, and continued, chewing small bits of stale crumble cookie. the first sign i was in bikini papyrus was a noticable increase in the number of bikini wearing papyrus letters. i brandished a freshly baked muffin in much the same way as an angry african kid would brandish an AK-47. they raised a white flag and i rescued the cinnamon shoe girl. together we turned over, apple and cinnamon turnover. then we lived happily ever after until jefferson aeroplane asked me what happened to a certain white rabbit who was still giggling in my guts.